I know I've been away and haven't actually posted in more than 3 weeks. I'd been working on a series of posts but then I found out about a family member's passing.
The person who passed was my Great Aunt and a sister to my most beloved Grandmommy. I'd lost touch with her over the past several years when my father moved away. There was that sense of losing touch with that entire place and the pain associated with losing my Grandmother. Certain times I'd see my Grandmommy in my Aunt Clara and it hurt to feel her so close and yet so unreachable. When she laughed and then looked down, I used to see a happier and less troubled version of my Grandmommy and a younger version of her mother, my Grandma Elma.
Actually, both Aunts Ruby and Clara remind me so much of my Grandmommy in different ways that it was hard to be really with them. It was the same with my Uncle Jimmy and my Poppy (my grandpa). It's a convoluted thing though. Because in the end, you just wind up missing time spent with another person you love who can't help that they cut their eyes to the side a certain way, or laugh a familiar laugh or even walk the same as another person.
Nevertheless, I shouldn't have lost touch and just because we think of a person fondly and often doesn't mean they know we think of them fondly and often. It was inexcusable and I felt very guilty since it was now too late to fix. I couldn't even attend the funeral due to obligations here.
Hence, the past couple of weeks have been without posting or doing much online at all. But I can't leave off forever since that never did anyone any good. The best I can do now is to be sure that I don't ever lose touch with those I care about again. To be sure they know I love them. So for my family that comes here to see what I'm up to...I Love You. Aunt Ruby, that does mean you, too!
For all those who are probably embarrassed right now because we've never met, please excuse the family hug.